my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
this just has baby written all over it
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
