he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
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