yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
