Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I am spending my child support on dildos
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
