Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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