You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize