I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
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