I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize