i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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