i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
