I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
you didnt know i had herpes?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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