at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
