so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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