his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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