i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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