I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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