He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
