How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
