Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
