PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
