He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
