youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize