We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize