don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Randomize
