I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
