BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
