I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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