in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
