the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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