So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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