Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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