What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I just found puke in my bra..
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Randomize
