doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
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hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
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I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?