3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
