Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am http://tfl.nu/6qjs
  Replies (7) Good night (2070) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/c22r
  Replies (14) Good night (463) Bad night (3848)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work http://tfl.nu/ovrn
  Replies (31) Good night (4686) Bad night (673)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it http://tfl.nu/sa3y
  Replies (52) Good night (1323) Bad night (6153)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words. http://tfl.nu/bbmw
  Replies (27) Good night (583) Bad night (5146)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party. http://tfl.nu/a5ld
  Replies (33) Good night (11502) Bad night (2992)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life http://tfl.nu/k5dc
  Replies (13) Good night (4465) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news. http://tfl.nu/pxui
  Replies (10) Good night (1946) Bad night (1155)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny http://tfl.nu/yacg
  Replies (8) Good night (1151) Bad night (527)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar. http://tfl.nu/3xxn
  Replies (1) Good night (1498) Bad night (1060)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?" http://tfl.nu/jtkv
  Replies (7) Good night (797) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life http://tfl.nu/x15r
  Replies (22) Good night (951) Bad night (1611)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me. http://tfl.nu/jaom
  Replies (1) Good night (459) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him. http://tfl.nu/xmf9
  Replies (4) Good night (574) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina. http://tfl.nu/bvik
  Replies (2) Good night (345) Bad night (466)

Randomize