So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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