I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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