i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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