I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
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So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
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I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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