So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Semen is not good for contacts.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
