Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
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