found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
