More tranny stories later!
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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