Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
