she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize