OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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