Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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