when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
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