Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Your topless pictures make me question reality
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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