she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
this must be what syphilis tastes like
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I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
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I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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