Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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