I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize